Full Body Search...











COLOR-BLIND-FRIENDLY!

Donate - help our new project







Winner of the competition of "Prettier Motherland Pages, for a Prettier Sovietnet!"

The Politburo "Award for Excellence in Socialist Webdesign in the Youth Collective" is a worldwide recognized symbol of quality for extremely advanced and progressive websites in the Sovietnet of the brother countries of the Comecon (Communist Economies)




Kerry's KGB File
printer-friendly view
PRINT THIS PAGE
Page 1 of 1    View previous :: View next
I am John Kerry... Or not?...
By The Politbureau
10/22/04 - 8:18 pm

Submitted by Comrade PHFFFTHHH!!

© Andrew Cutraro/St Louis Dispatch, Zuma Press;

----------------------
I am John Kerry. I was against the first Iraq war, I am against the second Iraq war, but I voted for it. Now I'm against it but I was for it.

I support the UN. I'm against terrorism and against the Iraq war. But I voted for the Iraq war. So, I voted against the first war and supported the second war, wait...

I'm against gay marriage but for gay unions. I support gays but think the SF mayor is wrong. I support gay marriages. No, wait, gay unions. I'm Catholic. Wait, I'm Jewish. My dad was Jewish. But I was raised Catholic. What am I?

I don't want to confuse people. I am for abortions, but wait, I'm Catholic, and Catholics are pro-life. But I might consider putting pro-life judges in office, but I'm not sure. I do know I voted for a pro-life judge, but I stated that it was a mistake.

I went to Vietnam. But I was against Vietnam. I testified against fellow US troops in Vietnam, threw my medals away and led others to do the same. But I am a war hero. Against the war. I stated I threw my medals away then I threw my ribbons away. I then revealed that I threw my ribbons away but not my medals, then lately I stated that I threw someone else's medals away and never threw anything of mine away. I believe ribbons and medals aren't the same thing. Medals come with ribbons, so now I believe that ribbons and medals are the same thing besides the fact that ribbons are cloth and medals are metal.

I wrote a book that pictured the US flag upside-down on its cover. But now I fly and campaign in a plane with a large flag right-side up on it. But sometimes, we fly upside-down for fun.

Yasser Arafat is a hero and a statesman. The Israelis shouldn't kill Palestinian terrorists, but they should stop terrorism. Yasser Arafat is a terrorist supporter. I support Mid East peace.

I am for the common man, unlike Bush. I am against the rich. But my family is worth 300 million dollars has a jet and many SUVs. I am the common man. I am against sending jobs overseas. My wife is a Heinz heir. Heinz has most factories offshore. I am against rewarding companies for exporting jobs as long as it is not Heinz.

I own $1 million in Wal-Mart stock. I believe Walmart is evil by driving small business owners out of town. I am a capitalist and I own part of Walmart but I am a good guy for small corporate America.

I own SUVs when I talk to my followers in Detroit, MI. Teresa owns SUVs, I don't, when I talk to tree hugging followers. I have a campaign jet that gets 1/3 mpg, which is great fuel efficiency.

I am against making military service an issue in presidential elections. I defended a draft dodger Clinton and stated that all serve in their own capacity whether they draft dodge or not. Did I mention, I served in Vietnam and am a hero? Are you questioning my patriotism? I served in Vietnam. My opponent didn't. I have three purple hearts! I am a hero. I am qualified to run this country since I served. I am John Kerry.
 
Reply with quote
Page 1 of 1   


stalin

Email this to a comrade!

(spread the revolution)

Comrade's Email
Your Email
Type your message here

Powered by phpBB 2.0.9 © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group
We've run into expenses building this site and spreading havoc on Union Square and beyond. If you like what you see, click below and donate a buck or two for the revolution!
 
REVOLUTIONS:

CONTEST:

CFK IN THE NEWS:
WE WATCH THE WATCHERS

CURRENT TRUTH:

RED SONGS:

KERRY'S KGB FILE:

ASK A KOMMISSAR

FOREIGN RELATIONS

RED STAR RADIO

Re-educate yourself
by playing this politically correct game!

Komrads who have paid for @CommunistsForKerry.com
email address can sign in here:

Komrads who want to obtain @CommunistsForKerry.com address click here








Awards and medals
earned by our youth collective for this website

leninorder (15K)

Recipients of
Order of Lenin
for heroic service to the Revolution

orderpatriotic (15K)
Recipients of
Order of the Great Patriotic War

redstarmedal (13K)
Recipients of
Order of the Red Star

 

©* 1917 – 2004 Communists For Kerry, Ltd., Politburo and Central Committee of the Socialist Unity Party, Ministry of Truth, Comrades of Armed Organs, Young Pioneer Organizations, Komsomol, Society for Sport and Technology, Society for Advancement of Secondary Sexual Characteristics, and other groups and collectives of our great Socialist Amerikan Motherland.
____________
* People’s Property notification (known as copyright in the degraded non-socialist economic region of dying capitalism)